Lost and haven’t found

I like observing people. Not in a creepy way, but i just like seeing people do or act in particular. That way, i would know about the personality of the person and understand them more.

It is interesting for me to understand.

I know that everybody has their own problems, and it depends on the person how they would act and respond. Whether they will break down because of their problems, ignore them, or solve them. Many people come to me to talk about their problems, and i will help them the best i can by giving them advice. But when i think about my own problems, i found out that there are so many things going on in my life that i don’t like the way they turned out.

But i still feel ok, i guess.

I don’t know, i just don’t make my problems become some burden for myself that can make me feel stressed out. I just deal with it. But lately i feel so empty i don’t even know why. I feel lost, i don’t know where or who to go to make me feel better and whole again.

So many things went wrong. I don’t know what to do….

I don’t want to keep my problems to myself but i don’t trust someone so easily to share my problems with. I am a closed person, i guess.

I am writing this at school and i want to cry my heart out right now, but i can’t. Nobody cares. They would act like if they care but they actually don’t!

I am sad and i hate people.

The thing is, people come and go whenever they like. They don’t even care about me. They only come when they need something and then just leave like nothing has happened.

At some point i am really really really jealous of you guys who can talk so openly about yourself and things going on in your life.

But who cares about me anyway????

PEOPLE ARE MEAN AND I HATE PEOPLE!!!!!

What is wrong with me? Oh God i don’t want to cry right now, not here. In this place called school or probably a living hell.

Oh damn since when did i become so melancholy like this. I know i am not usually like this. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME OH MY GOD.

I wonder if you guys actually read my blog at this point. If you do, I’m sorry you have to be reading this piece of trash right now. But thank you for staying, i really appreciate it.

Once again, thank you.
 

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